Phot by Naomi Shah
There’s no such thing as a template for anyone’s life.
We have to be prepared for countless contingencies, discoveries, and shifts in direction that we never could have anticipated. But no matter which path you end up on, there are certain habits of mind and characteristics that will serve you well—from the ability to balance multiple priorities to the willingness to lean on the people closest to you and ask for advice when you need it.
These are just two of the valuable lessons I learned from my mom, Sonal. As I look back on how my life has come together, I’m grateful that my mom was always there to teach me how to navigate problems, realize what I’m best at, and ultimately help me create a unique path rather than following an existing one.
While my mom taught me more than I could ever summarize here, I’d like to share the six lessons that could help other young female entrepreneurs.
1. How to Prioritize
My mom was always able to balance the demands of leading a company with being a mother to my brother and me. She was there to pick us up from school when we felt sick or talk when we needed it, and she was fully invested in her responsibilities as a parent even when it wasn’t easy.
She often blended her home and work life by practicing her presentations with us, even when we were too young to understand what she was talking about.
My dad was the vice president of her company (NSI, software consulting and recruiting business), and he often joked that he reported to mom at work and at home. She showed me that it’s possible to juggle priorities—a rich family life and rewarding career aren’t mutually exclusive.
2. It’s Okay to Lean on Those Closest to You – And to Do the Same for Them
Whenever my mom would travel to trade shows or client pitches, my dad would take over the duties of home life (my brother and I always had to anticipate some “experimental” cooking during these periods).
Then she would do the same for him. This showed me how crucial it is to rely on the people you trust, whether they’re friends, family, or colleagues.
I’ve realized that this is especially important for founders because it’s impossible to micromanage every facet of your business, nor is it healthy. It’s necessary to delegate essential roles to your team, which requires the conviction that they will do a great job, as well as the modesty to recognize that they know things you don’t.
3. Always Project Confidence
My mom immigrated to the United States in her early twenties, an experience that had to have been as daunting as it was exciting. She immediately went into pharmaceutical sales, a high-pressure and competitive field.
As if that wasn’t enough, she was also the only young woman of color on her sales team.
These are all reasons why my mom instantly understood how important it was to project confidence, even when that wasn’t how she actually felt. It’s no secret that people of color face unique professional obstacles, such as prejudice in the hiring process.
Women have to contend with discrimination as well, especially in male-dominated fields like STEM. These realities made it all the more important that my mom taught me the value of confidence, regardless of what others may be thinking.
4. You Don’t Need to Have Everything Figured Out From the Start
Although my mom originally pursued medicine, she later earned her MBA—a dramatic change that put her on course to become the CEO of a successful company. This was a powerful reminder that it wasn’t necessary to know exactly what I wanted to do right from the start.
While it can be intimidating to switch careers, your professional life should be a process of discovery and self-realization.
According to a survey conducted by Indeed, almost half of employees say they’ve made a total career change, 81 percent of whom did so because they were unhappy in their other job or sector. Instead of being frightened of these changes, we should embrace them.
5. Be Your Own Person
Nobody told my mom how to immigrate to a new country, lead a company, start a family, and somehow find a way to balance all these things. One reason she managed to do so much was the fact that she never fit into any stereotypes or compromised who she really is.
While most CEOs are generally extroverted, my mom has always been soft-spoken and introverted.
Instead of resisting this, my mom has used it to forge more genuine connections with people and create trust among her colleagues. She showed me that it’s possible to enter STEM, run a company, and refuse to accept any artificial barriers to these goals.
6. Work Hard and Make a Difference
My mom ran a company for a quarter of a century, won a shelf of small business awards in Oregon alongside my dad, and contributed to our community in innumerable ways.
While my parents were always fully present when the family was together, they also discussed work around the dinner table, on vacation, and so on.
This always reminded my brother and I that they were passionate about what they did and that they cared about their contributions to the world—a lesson I try to put into practice every day.
